This is the column that Ann Coulter may not be able to write. I will explain.
One of the benefits of being a best-selling author and a millionairess is that you can hire very large Samoan men to crush any liberal geek that happens to be stupid enough to get within reach of you. Unfortunately, many of us do not have that luxury. We need more. We require advice on potential options that may be exercised when the liberals have actually burrowed their way inside the razor-wire.
There is a direct relationship between the plunging liberal IQ score and the recent surge in popularity of random acts of violence and vandalism among the liberals. With this in mind, we can expect more random acts of anti-social and usually criminal behavior from these traitors, and as such, need to be prepared.
Unfortunately, you can't just shoot them in the face with a .357 or scalp them anymore, like in the good old days. And suing each and every one of them would take up all of your time. So there must be alternatives to dealing with these social cockroaches.
Fortunately for my readers, I have an idea. Several actually.
Some of you have already observed that the libtards have an especially violent reaction to Tyger. They can lose sleep, wits, and even hair lice once they meet me. A few of you that know me in person and over the years can attest to this. I do not play well with them.....at all. There is a reason for this. The libtard can sense that I know how they think....errr, "feel" (most liberals haven't "thought" anything their entire lives). They "know" that I know them. And I do. It's true. You see, to the libtard, I'm the traitor. They can tell that I've walked among them, smiling, waving, sipping their Kool-Aid....and they kneweth me not (hehehehe). I've heard all their little deep, dark, psychotic fantasies that they don't talk about in mixed company. I've sat with them while they laugh themselves into hysterics talking about blowing up the White House with the President in it. I've heard, I've seen....and I know. And they can sense this. They can't stand me for dropping dime on all their retarded, traitorous bullshit.
As if I care what chimpanzee's think.....lol...how funny.
Anyway, here are a few things ...secrets, if you will... about libtards that my conservative readers can use at any time when fate, circumstance, and bad luck force one into actually having to DEAL with a liberal.
Knowledge is power. Knowing a few things about libtards will give you a HUGE edge when dealing with them. There are two things that you can bet the farm on and win 90% of the time when dealing with a liberal:
1) Most liberals have an outstanding warrant for their arrest in some state somewhere.
2) Most liberals have illegal drugs on their person, in their car, or in their home.
LOL.....now you may understand why they hate me so much. Knowing these two things about a liberal gives you a HUGE advantage any time that you wish to flush them from your reality. Now the liberals themselves only have one way to deal with Republicans....well, two. Attempted assault and battery, and theft. Both felonies you will note. This is the libtard first response: crime. We observed this first-hand in New Orleans I believe......
However, over the years I have learned that a liberals worst fear is a police officer going through their stuff. It almost ALWAYS results in an arrest. They just can't help themselves when it comes to being petty criminals. Most libtards are so paranoid that the mere mention of the word "police officer" can induce what I call "eye-darting". The libtard is immediately thinking of the drugs they have on them. That will send the vast majority of them running for the hills, to borrow a phrase (ahem).
There are a few peckerheads, however, who think they are something real special (or have already done all their drugs), and decide to be complete fools. To a liberal, this is bravery. LOL. So, when the liberal gets too out-of-hand, simply have the police run their ID for outstanding warrants. Most officers will be way ahead of you anyway. This will take care of over half of the assholes that haven't already gotten the clue yet, right then and there. The cherry on top is that you get to watch them get cuffed and shoved into the police cruiser. LMAO!!!
Death threats on the Internet? No problem. Simple call the FBI and report it. The FBI ALWAYS follows up on these and the perp gets a nice little permanent file with the Federal Bureau of Investigation.....for the rest of their lives. Usually that comes back on them at a later date. Most cities now have special "cyberspace crime units" in their regular police forces, such as New York City, and DO RESPOND to these threats. It's actually quite hilarious when a couple of police officers show up to some liberal douchebags door while he's hysterically pounding away on his keyboard thinking he's untouchable and above the law while he threatens people on the Internet. I've done it. It's priceless. The mental picture lasts a lifetime.
For the rest.....there is always the .357 and the scalping knife. (ewg)
: D
Love, Light, and Ballet Tights;
Tyger