"Man-Bear-Pig Inventor Switches Gears"

     Alright, boys and girls, everyone please have a seat and we'll get started.  Michael, leave Deborah's pig-tails alone.  Tell your mother that she needs to get you a sister.  Sheesh.

     Okay, everyone pull out your "S.L.D.", we have a small editing change that needs to be made.  "S.L.D.", Michael....."Stupid Liberal Dictionary"....you know, your PC Bible.  Exactly, ...the place where you store your porno.

     Everyone got them out?  Good, good.  Turn to page 12 and go to the entry "global warming".  Got it?  Okay.  Now everyone scratch out the word "global warming" and write in the word "climate change" above it.  No, Michael, not "climb it"......"climate" with a "c".  (eyeroll)

     There, now that we've done the paperwork we can get started with the indoctrin.....errr, "lesson", yeah...lesson, that's it.

     Here at the Department of Putrid Eduction we received an urgent message today.  It arrived by....carrier parrot, funny enough......huh.  (scratches head)  But anyway, the message was from Our Leader and Saviour, Al Gore aka Mr. M-B-P.

     Here, I will read the message.

     "Deer boyz and girlz.  Hi theer!!!  This is Al Gore heer, and I've got a verry impurtant message fro u all tuday.  Thar is 2 much snow fallin fro me to keep sayin "global warming".  So weer now gunna be sayin "climate change".  Now, dunt yous be worryin none.  The Earth is still gunna blow up and end.  But it mite be hot now.....or it mite be culd 2.  Thut iz whut we knows now, it mite git hot or culd.  So dunt fergit and writ this wun down.  No more "global warming".  Now it's "climate change".  Mak sur thet u cum 2 tha "Climate Change Concert" we be havin this yeer.  I'm gunna evens sing with tha Dixi Cups!!!  ....errr, Hicks......errrr, Chix....yeah, Chix.  I amz so excited thut Tipper mite git sum tonit.  Wull, bye-bye, boyz and girlz!!!  Bye-bye!!!"

     So don't forget kids.  The next time those silly Republicans laugh in your face for crying about global warming in the middle of a frozen interstate, just scream at them, "It's not the warming....it's the CLIMATE CHANGE, stupid!!!!"

     Class dismissed!!!