Tyger Talk

"ABC: FIRE ROSIE NOW!!!"

     It's time for fatheads to roll.....

     It's time for ugly lesbos to hit the unemployment line.....

     It's time to cook the Pillsbury Dough Girl....

     And here is how we are going to do it:

     I would love to take credit for this idea, but I can't.  'DoesNotPlayWellWithLiberals' gets the credit, and she credited a Republican researcher named 'Ray'.

     The basic gist of her point is this.  Complaining to ABC does nothing.  ABC could give a shit.

     However....

     Complaining to ABC's SPONSORS will get a rapid response.  In light of that, I ran a quick search on the internet for the sponsors of "The View".  I couldn't find a single one.  But I DID FIND literally dozens and dozens of blogs about this very topic.  People want to boycott the advertisers on "The View", but no one watches the stupid show to know who the hell they are!!!......LMAO!!!

     Talk about dumbassed Ad Departments.  (chuckles)  ....Anyyyywaaaay.  What follows is from a bulletin that "Does Not..." posted earlier today.  It's....(hehehehehe) QUITE informative.  Use it and have a blast!!!!!

************************************************

(re-printed by permission)

This should help. For best results, everyone should email them and let them know why you're boycotting:

Sponsors for "The View"

Humira (medication)
Pier 1
Vaseline
Pillsbury
TJ Maxx
Stanley Steemer
Reach One (toothbrush)
M&M Mars
Janome (sewing machine give away)
Zyrtec
Tide
Marshall's
Stainmaster Carpet
Cottonelle toilet paper
Crest Whitening Rinse
"Meet the Robinson's"
Hellmann's
Claritin D
Woolite
Sears
Honey Bunches of Oats
Loestrin 24FE (medication)
Basement Finishing System (Owens Corning)
Excedrin
Cottonelle
Disney
Clorox (on their website)
Phoenix University (on their website)



Humira (medication)
https://www.abbott.com/abtcontactus/contact.do

Pier 1
If you are a member of the media and would like to find out more information about Pier 1, please visit www.pier1pressroom.com. For all other media or student inquiries, please call the Pier 1 Public Relations Office at (817) 252-8130.


Vaseline
For questions about Vaseline, please contact us at 1-800-457-7084 or fill out the form below.
http://www.vaseline.com/vaseline/vic.html (click on questions and comments and go for can't find what you want till you get the form for an email)


Pillsbury
http://consumercontacts.generalmills.com/C...w.pillsbury.com



TJ Maxx
http://www.tjmaxx.com/faq.aspx

Stanley Steemer
http://www.stanleysteemer.com/ContactUs.aspx

Reach One (toothbrush) Product of Johnson and Johnson
http://www.jnj.com/contact_us/index.htm;js...CEGU3AKB2IIWTT1

M&M Mars
http://us.mms.com/us/legal/feedback.jsp

Janome (sewing machine give away) You can contact local dealers from the site and it HAS ROSIE ON THE HOME PAGE!
http://www.janome.com/contact.php


Zyrtec
http://www.pfizer.com/pfizer/contact/mn_contact.jsp

Tide
http://www.tide.com/en_US/contactus.jsp

Marshall's
http://www.marshallsonline.com/customer_service.asp

Stainmaster Carpet
http://www.stainmaster.com/global/contact.jsp

Cottonelle toilet paper
http://www.cottonelle.com/index.asp

Crest Whitening Rinse
http://crest.custhelp.com/cgi-bin/crest.cf...enduser/ask.php

"Meet the Robinson's"
The Walt Disney Company
500 S. Buena Vista Street
Burbank, CA 91521


Hellmann's
http://www.mayo.com/contact_us.aspx

Claritin D
http://www.claritin.com/contact.aspx

Woolite
http://woolite.com/contact.shtml

Sears
http://www.sears.com/sr/misc/sears/custser...;vertical=SEARS

Honey Bunches of Oats owned by Kraft food
http://www.kraftfoods.com/main.aspx?m=contact_us/cu_form1

Loestrin 24FE (medication) This one was tricky to find and I think this is it. Several with the name of this medication are registered to this:
Registrant Contact Information:
Name: Michelle Gannon
Organization: Warner Chilcott Laboratories
Address 1: 100 Enterprise Drive
City: Rockaway
State: NJ
Zip: 07866
Country: US
Phone: +1.9734423200
Fax: +1.9734423346
Email:

Administrative Contact Information:
Name: Michelle Gannon
Organization: Warner Chilcott Laboratories
Address 1: 100 Enterprise Drive
City: Rockaway
State: NJ
Zip: 07866
Country: US
Phone: +1.9734423200
Email:




Basement Finishing System (Owens Corning)
http://www.owenscorning.com/feedback/feedback.asp

Excedrin
https://secure.novartisotc.com/secure.novar...cedrin/talk.jsp

Clorox
http://thecloroxcompany.consumerreply.com/Clorox/thecloroxcompany/faqs.nsf/WebContactUs?OpenForm

University of Phoenix 866-766-0766




Here is a sample of one email:

I endured ABC's The View with Rosie O'Donnell far too long. I heard her terrible comments about our country, our troops, and vile nonsense. It is difficult to believe you would want your products associated with those remarks but apparently you do as you are a sponsor of that show. In light of that, I will no longer be purchasing your products. That is unfortunate because I have enjoyed them in the past but I was so upset by O'Donnell's comments that I will not consider buying anything from your company while it is associated with The View or O'Donnell. If you want to waste your money supporting that foolishness, go right ahead. I will not.

No Longer Your Customer.

For Pier One, here are more contacts:
For additional media inquiries or any questions you have pertaining to public relations, please contact the associates below.

Misty Otto
Senior Public Relations Manager
(817) 252-8514
mbotto@pier1.com Joy Rich
Cause Branding Specialist
(817) 252-8345
jprich@pier1.com Ann Davis
Product Placement Specialist
(817) 252-8414
ajdavis@pier1.com Whitney Rogers
Public Relations Cooridinator
(817) 252-8130
wrrogers@pier1.com

For all other information, please call (817) 252-8000.
or visit www.pier1.com

Pier 1 Import's corporate address is:

Pier 1 Imports
100 Pier 1 Place
Fort Worth, Texas 76102




----------------- Bulletin Message -----------------
From: Does not play well with liberals
Date: 3/31/2007 12:10:00 PM


Conservatives outnumber extreme liberals, yet the liberals seem to control media messages. That is because conservatives complain to the channel that offense them but liberals complain to the sponsors of that channel and threaten boycott.

We need to do the same!! We need to threaten the companies who advertise on "The View"!!!
That is how the extreme left gets their ways! Let's do the same too, I don't really watch the View and if anyone knows the sponsors for them please list them on the Bulletin! Then we need to go after them and tell those companies that if ABC does not pull Rosie off air then we will boycott their products!!!!!!!!



Let's get her off the air!!!!!"

   *************************************************

     Thank you, 'Does Not Play Well...'.  Magnificently done!!!

     And there we have it.  Make each and every one of these companies pay a price for associating themselves with a bitch so fucking stupid that she isn't even aware that fire melts steel.  (LOLOL!!!) 

     As for myself, I've been having a blast sending these idiots the most ...."colorful" email you can imagine.  Hehehehehe!!!  By the end of next week, 'ABC' should stand for "Another Bitch Canned".  ;-) 

     Let's get this stupid lesbian bitch FIRED!!!  They can replace her with Michael Moore...his tits are bigger than Rosie's anyway!!!  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

     (crosses eyes, puts on Washington Redskin pig snout, and affects stupid Brooklyn accent)  "Foy da foist time in'z histowy....fi-ay melted steelz..."

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

 

Hey....wait a second.  I just had a thought.  Everyone back up.  Isn't it illegal to can whales?  : /

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!   AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

"Pelosi Cuddles With Terrorists"

     Against the advice and wishes of the White House, the Screecher of the House, Nancy Shit-For-Brains Pelosi, is taking her international wine-tasting suarez to Syria.

     That's right.....the top Democrap in America is going to be swilling it up with Hezbollah this weekend.  Not only that, but she's dragging along America's only moslem congressman.  Isn't that just so special?

     While American troops are killing terrorists, some of them straight FROM Syria, in Iraq.....Nancy Fucking Pelosi is going to be clinking crystal with the financier and organizer of Hezbollah.

     Ummm, folks....there is a word for this in the English language.  It's called "treason".

     I am calling for the immediate investigation and arrest of Nancy Pelosi on charges of treason and aiding and abetting the enemy.  We need to know what the hell she is carrying in her diplomatic pouch, and what the hell the congressmoslem is saying to the leaders of Hezbollah.  What information is he passing to them?  What plans is he making with them?  And what information is Nancy Pelosi giving to Syria and Hezbollah?  This is the woman who "swears" up and down that Abscam Jack Murtha is an "honest man".  Uh-huh....

     I have to admit here that I was wrong.  I honestly didn't see Pelosi collaborating with terrorist states out in public.  Not like this.  She is meeting with Hezbollah and telling the people of the United States of America to just go straight to hell.  The arrogance of this woman is simply stunning.

     Nancy Pelosi should perhaps put down her copy of "Why Mommy Is A Demoslut And Has Genital Warts" and re-read the history of the French Revolution.  It wasn't that long ago that traitors like Nancy Pelosi were dragged out of their offices and hung from the nearest lamp-post until dead.  In droves too.

     The Speaker of the House is meeting with moslem terrorist leaders.  You can now all move your Doomsday Clock forward one minute.

     We are getting vewwwwwwwwy close to D-Day.   Vewwwwwwwy close.

"Rosie Given PhD In Metallurgy For Proving Fire Can't Melt Steel"

     Well, it's official.

     Everyone's favorite fat-ugly-lesbo-communist-pig-bitch has finally let the mung out of her dung.  Rosie O'Fucktard has joined the growing list of liberal "scientists" sent to explain "the facts" to the peasants.

     First we have the Man-Bear-Pig person, arguably the "Greatest Climb-a-tologist To Ever Live"....then we have Dr. Sean Penn, male moisture and fashion design consultant.  Then we have John-I-Fly-The-Dirtiest-Jets-On-Earth-But-I'm-Green Travolta.  He's an aeronautics expert AND a climb-a-tologist.  And now we have Rosie the Metallurgist.  And not just a Metallurgist.....but a fucking idiot conspiracy theorist as well!!!

     Hehehehehehe.....I SO love it when the Moonbat loses it and exposes their numerous mental illnesses.

     Now....I have to take a moment here and address my favorite libtard lurkers that read my blogs like a meth-head crawls his/her/it's carpets.

(points and laughs in libtard faces)  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!   AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

     You bastards are funnier than a midget sack-race!!!  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!  And...and...and Rosie is ...one of you!!!!!   AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

     Admit it, ass-monkies....admit it!!!  When Rosie started blathering on about "fire melting steel!!!", you all went, "YES!!!!" ...didn't you??!!!  Admit it, freaks....admit it!!!!   AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!  You dumb motherfuckers agree with a fat-lesbo-schizo who hangs upside down like the fucking parasite that she is!!!   AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

     Good LORD.....I can't breathe I'm laughing so hard!!!!

     Hang on a second......

     (breathes in paper bag)

     Okay, okay....that's better.  So where were we?

     Oh yeaaaaaaaaah......"for the first time in history...fire melted steel."  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

     Shit!!!  I got to get a grip.....this is too much.....hang on again...

   

    Okay...okay.  Whew!!!  Let's try this again, shall we?  For real this time...

    So what can we learn from Tub-O'Shit's lesson in metallurgy?   Wellllllllll...........for starters, fire apparently cannot and has never in history....melted steel????

     I guess it's safe to say that Rosie O'Fucktard has never seen an acetylene torch at work, eh?  I guess Rosie has never seen all that "FIRE!!!!" in a US Steel factory, eh?  I guess basic third grade science completely eluded the rug-munching fat-assed lunatic....eh?  I guess Moron Moonbat has never seen a picture of jet wreckage and wondered how all that steel in the plane ...melted???  Can we assume that a short movie on "welding" would send the O'Fucktarded one into a coma?

     Good GOD!!!  This bitch has the IQ of a fucking brick!!!

     Hey, Rosie?  If fire doesn't melt steel....then what does, you perverse lesbo FREAK???  Ice???  Global warming??  Your dog's tongue???  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

     So fire can't melt steel, eh?  ROFLMMFAO!!!!!!  Well, ....who knew???!!!!

     AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!

     This is what happens when you are raised on a steady diet of dog's tongues, cheap booze, and Bambi movies.  Your fucking brain rots and falls into your asshole.

     Fire can't melt steel.....AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!  What a freak....WHAT A FREAK!!!!  The only thing funnier than watching that fat fuck spin around like some manic retard was watching the other idiot pretend soccer moms sit there and nod their botoxed faces like a bunch of glaze-eyed grazing cows!!!

     They BOUGHT EVER FUCKING WORD THAT FAT LESBIAN MORON SAID!!!!  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

     AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!  Someone stop me!!!  I should have to pay for comedy like this!!!!

     AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

"Special Announcement: Payback Time"

     Hehehehehe.....You guys are going to love this one!!!

     Remember how the fucking lib-assholes are always running around setting fires at protest rallies?  Remember how libtards love to come out and show their support of the troops by screaming at them, spitting on them, and cussing at them?  And then lie about it in print?  Remember how the liberal traitors love to dress up in veils and pretend they are moslem terrorists?  How they threaten the soldiers?  How they threaten Republicans?

     Well, ...try this one on for size.

     This is my daughter:

     She runs a small modeling agency out of Seattle, Washington.  She's 21 years old and doing it all on her own.  It's small, but she schedules regular work for them and is constantly looking for bigger gigs.  She's also VERY Republican, loves her nation, loves George W. Bush, and supports the troops and the War On Terror 110%.

     She turns liberal men who haven't gone queer yet into blubbering idiots just by saying "Hi" to them.  She's even managed to acquire her very own New-Age Liberal stalker.  But no worries there....I trained her myself.  Most American girls date with a condom in their purse.  My daughter dated with a double-edged punch-dagger in her purse.  While the public school teachers wanted to teach her how to "use a condom", I taught her how to stab her date's femoral artery and twist (the wound will never close and they bleed to death in 2.5 minutes)  When she was 17 she beat the living shit out of five or six (I forget which) "brutha's" who had jumped herself, her date, and his friend in a parking garage and attacked them for the color of their skin (they are white).   The date got cold-cocked and was unconscious, but his friend managed to stay conscious and watch while she taught those Black Boy's On Mopeds a strong lesson in self defense, hand-to-hand combat, and a target-rich environment.  Screw with a Navy SEAL's daughter at your own risk.  She just might neuter you on General Purposes alone.

     And for the record you guys are wrong...;-)...the New Age Liberal stalker is a woman and a full-blown rug-munching lesbo queer.  LOL!!!  Welcome to the United States of Libbyland, 2007.  Even the stalkers are fags now.  LMAO!!!

     Anywaaaaaaay......guess what she's doing?

     Correct:  A fashion show.  This Friday, April 6th.  Here is the invitation:

     Now why am I blogging about a fashion show?  Observe.

     My daughter saw the story of the libtard fags burning effigies of the soldiers and hating them on TV the other day.  In Portland, Oregon, if memory serves.  It upset her.  As a matter of fact, it upset her so much that she has decided to do a Fashion Show for the troops!!!

     That's right!!!

     Angelesea and her crew of Republican bathing beauties are doing a benefit fashion show here in Seattle this Friday for the Special Forces 1st Battalion, which is departing overseas this weekend.  They have gotten a local car dealer to donate a brand new Hum-Vee that they are putting onstage, all the soldiers are in a special V.I.P. area with the girls, and they will ALL be introduced and CHEERED onstage!!!!

     Wooooooo Hoooooooo!!!!

     But that's not all....oh no.  Evening Magazine will also be covering the event, and they have a small slot on the local Channel Five news......so, a bunch of beautiful girls cheering on OUR SOLDIERS will be broadcast all over Washington State!!!

     Now, this is where I come in.  I will be there in attendance.  I will be carrying quite a bit of mace.  The first liberal FUCK that opens his/her/don't know hole....even a fraction...will be burping mace for a month.  This is my daughter and I guarantee you fucking liberals lots of pain if you even think about screwing with her or her girls.  Be advised:  There will be a Tyger in the crowd, he will be watching closely, and he's hungry.  The libtard that messes with my kid may very well not survive the event.

     Yes, that's a threat, motherfuckers.....  : D

     If the Portland assholes show up, I can assure you that it won't be on TV.  Stay at home for this one fucktards.  You've been warned.  Some of my friends have offered me $200 for a picture of three anarchist-libtard-fuckheads with their protest signs shoved up their assholes.  I'm eager to comply.  Word to the wise.  ;-)

     Besides, do you know how embarrassing it is to have your cheesedick, hippy ass beaten silly by a bunch of women in bathing suits?

     Speaking of "the girls".....let's take a peek at what First Battalion will get to ogle at to remind them of home while they work their butts off killing bad guys.

     Eat Your Heart out, you liberal fucks.  Compete with this, assholes.

     Anywaaaaaaaay.....I have about a week to drum up as much support as I can for this creative and wonderful idea.  I'm going to send a barrage of email to Hannity and O'Reilly and see if they can't actually BE as patriotic and supportive of the troops as they claim all the time.  I'm going to send Michael Savage email, Rush email......hell, I'm even going to invite the Right Brother's to come and sing.  BRING IT ON!!!!!!!!   BRING IT ON!!!!!

     "BUSH WAS RIGHT!!!!"

     I urge ALL of my readers, in the strongest terms possible, to assist me in this.  Let's FLOOD the conservative talking heads with this and see if we can't get some national coverage here!!!  It's a fashion show with girls in bikini's for crying sakes!!!!  If that doesn't get their attention, nothing will.

     With that in mind...I've composed a small "Invitation List" for the Fashion Show.

"Tyger Arrested For Blogging"

     Well, it finally happened......

     The liberals finally got through to Homeland Security and the FBI and complained about Tyger.

: (

     This evening I got a visit from Homeland Security, the FBI, the CIA, CAIR, the ACLU, and a lesbian who claimed to represent moveon-puke-org.

     Yup, ....another sign of the apocalyspe....Tyger was busted for blogging...

   

     Fortunately for my readers, Doc Brown was hiding on the porch and taped the entire thing.  And now, brought to you "almost live" from "COPS:  LIVE WITH TYGER".....

     (starts "Bad Boy's" song)

     (knock, knock)

     Tyger:  (answers door)  "Can I help you?"

     Mr. Brown:  "Are you Tyger aka 'The Blogger Beast' aka 'That Neo-Con Satan'?"

     Tyger:  "I might answer to a few of those.  Why do you ask?"

     Mr. Brown:  "May I come in?  It's really wet out here."

     Tyger:  "Sure.  Bring your puppies with you.  Now who the hell are you?"

     Mr. Brown:  "I'm Mr. Brown from the Department of Homeland Security and this is Mr. Black from the FBI.  Over there is Mr. White from the CIA, and that's Mr. Yellow from the ACLU, and the gentleman with the turban picking his nose is Mr. Pink...he's from CAIR."

     Mr. Pink:  "Allahdinnawash!!!  Why do I have to be 'Mr. Pink'?  Why am I always 'Mr. Pink'?"

     Tyger:  "Who's the fat, barefoot bitch in the burlap sack?"

     Mr. Brown:  "I don't know."

     Fat-Barefoot-Bitch-In-Burlap-Sack:  "I'm Latwinka U. Peters from moveon-dip-org."

     Tyger:  "Dare I ask what the "U" stands for?"

     Mr. Brown:  "Look here, Tyger, we didn't come over here to play games.  There are some serious charges that you've been accused of here, and we're here to investigate them."

     Mr. Black:  "That's right.  We've been watching you for some time now...in the interests of national security and all."

     Tyger:  "Just like the good old days, eh?  So what's the crime now, Mr. Buttmonkey....errr, Black...."

     Mr. Black:  "You've been accused of....upsetting liberals."

     Mr. White:  "That's right, and it's spreading across the globe.  As a matter of fact, as we speak there are now twelve liberals in therapy in Australia.  Two have reportedly slipped into coma's....and ALL after reading YOUR blogs, Mr. Tyger!!!  You are responsible!!!"

     Tyger:  "Well I never...."

     Mr. Pink:  "Waikalamama salami myassitch....he hates moslems too!!!!  He is a....a...a...a...hater-of-moslems.....he must be beheaded according to Sharia Law immediately!!!"

     Tyger:  "Look, Camel-breath, I don't hate "moslems too!!!"....just the one's that believe in jihad."

     Mr. Pink:  "Allahasaids!!!  But all moslems believe in jihad!!!"

     Tyger:  (chuckles)  "...Yeah...I know...ain't that a bitch?"

     Mr. Pink:  "Grrrrrr......"

     Mr. Brown:  "See. You're making people upset, Tyger.  Why just look at Mr. Pink!!!  He's angry and he's Islamic....and, ...and...and that's not allowed here in America, mister!!!  Just who the HELL do you think you are, anyway??!!!"

     Tyger:  "The Republican your mommy warned you about.  I can offer him some chewable rat poison if it will ease his pain?"

     Mr. Brown:  "NOW GODDAMMIT TYGER!!!!  THAT'S THE KINDA STUFF WE'RE TALKING ABOUT!!!!  YOU'RE MAKING PEOPLE MAD, DAMMIT!!!"

     Tyger:  "Oh, Good Lord!!!  Sit down, you fat fuck.  You're going to have a coronary.  Don't they exercise you lap dogs anymore?   ....No, no, no.  Not there, the chair is for guests.  Sit on the fucking floor."

     Mr. Brown:  "Why you son-of-a-bitch!!!!  I'm going to CALL THE FBI ON YOU!!!  Argghhhhhh...."

     Mr. Black:  "Ed...uh, ...we ARE the FBI..."

     Mr. White:  "Alright!!!  Enough!!!  Tyger you are hereby formally charged with upsetting liberals, homosexuals, homosexual liberals, moslems, liberal moslems, and homosexual moslems, ...and making them all cry."

     Mr. Pink:  "Grrrrr......Allahhashemmrhoids!!!  There ARE NO HOMOSEXUAL MOSLEMS!!!"

     Tyger:  "What about Yusir Are-a-fag?  He was so queer he tried to hit up on Bubba Clinton..."

     Mr. Pink:  "Arrrrrrgghhh....Islamisgay!!!  Allah help me!!!  May a thousand dogs from a million fishes feast on your plentiful SUV axles!!!"

     Tyger:  "You make as much sense as tits on a boar hog, Ahab. Why don't you go shave your camel or something.  So, Brownie-boy, what's the penalty for my literary licentiousness?"

     Mr. Brown:  "Tyger, you are hereby sentenced to Anger Management classes, Soccer-Mom-Racism classes, Death-Cults-Posing-As-Religions Sensitivity training, Homosexuality Empathy classes, Multi-Culturalistic-Expression-Through-Terrorism Training, completion of Proficiency in Ebonics 101 class, completion of Revisionist Human Biology According To Roe vs. Wade class, and a thorough indoctrination into Style-Over-Substance Philosophy As A Way Of Life training."

     Mr. Yellow:  "Don't forget the NAMBLA Is American training."

     Tyger:  "Oh for the love of God....have you fucking idiots completely lost your goddamn minds?  How the hell am I supposed to do all of that and who is going to pay for it?"

     Mr. Brown:  "Oh, you'll be under house arrest.  You'll complete all of your classes online.  You're being sentenced to a year of myspace."

: /

    

   

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!    AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

     LOL....you liberal dickheads crack me up.

"Ahmadinejad: 14 Tony Blair: 0"

     I told you guys that Ahmadinejad was going to pull some stunt like this to divert world attention.  Hell, he even got Rosie O'Fucktard to run interference for him on American TV.

     This is a short one, but you guys weigh in with your picks and opinions.

     My money says that Tony Blair and the British don't have the balls to do anything but whine like the little poodles that they are.  The wives, children, and parents of those British Marines better stage some mock burials and say their goodbyes, because the British people aren't going to do a damned thing to get their hostages released.

     Tony Blair is on the hot-line to Jimmy Carter as this goes to press, asking for "sage and wise advice".  'Nuff said...

     Much as I hate to say it, the moslems are right.  America in particular and all of the western nations in general simply have too high of a percentage of feminized-faggot-men in their societies to ever permit them to rescue these British Marines or stand up to Ahmadinejad and his Islamic Insanity.  Shit-talking pansies aren't going to rescue anyone....and the Iranians know it.  They are all laughing at the soft, feminized American-European men.  In their faces and quite boisterously too.

     How does it feel?  Seriously....I want to know.  How does it feel to be such a fag-pansy that a stone-age freak is able to laugh in your face and do anything he wants with your nation, your family, and your loved ones?  How does it feel to be so feminized that you are intimidated by anarchist freaks who call themselves Americans?  Would "mommy" approve?

     Enquiring minds want to know.

     Anyway....say "bye-bye" to the British Marines.  If Tony Blair does a single manly thing to rescue them, I'll put a feather in my hat, call it macaroni, and then eat the son-of-a-bitch.

     Poodles don't rescue anyone.  Never have.

"No More Free Passes"

     Better hitch up your britches for this one.  (pulls off glove slowly)

     I've been surfing around myspace and the rest of Al Gore's invention, reading blogs.  And it seems that some feathers are rather ruffled, and we aren't just talking about the usual turkey feathers in disarray around your average libtards ass.  We are talking a few Republican feathers as well.  Some "Christian" sensibilities have been offended by Republican bloggers like myself it would seem.

     (chuckles)

     I've been waiting for this one.  I'll explain.

     Lately, some of the "high-road" Republican IDIOTS, you know, the one's who absolutely refuse to get in the dirt and slug it out with these fucking liberal traitors and instead encourage everyone to adopt their LOSING tactic of giving out free passes to every liberal swinging STD that slithers around this nation, have been expressing their "displeasure and regret" at bloggers like myself who treat liberals like the fucking pieces of dog-shit that they are.  Uh huh.  And you KNOW WHO YOU ARE.  (By now my regular readers know who and what I'm addressing and not to take this personally.)

     This part of the blog is directed to those high-brow Republicans who think that Tyger and his ilk are "inappropriate".

     Fuck off.

     I'm sick and tired of your lame-assed shitbag tactics that handed this nation to a bunch of baby-brain sucking demons.  Your goddamn "turn-the-other-cheek" horseshit has put this nation in dire straights.  Some of you idiots are so fucking anal that you think that using a certain word in the English language is more of a crime than supporting terrorism, ...or baby-murders, ...or utterly destroying your own nation while you sit there and do NOTHING.  (Ummm, all those prayers haven't been working and don't count....America is closer to being the U.S.S.R. than ever before.)  My question to you clowns is this?  Are you so damn stupid that to prove your goddamn point you'd hand this nation over to a bunch of child-molesting teachers, a bunch of homosexual liars, and a bunch of traitors who openly support Islamic terrorism?  Because that's what you "hi-brow" assholes are doing...AND DID!!!  It's time you accept responsibility for your own stupidity.  Your dumbassed attitude is helping them win...daily!!!  And has for decades.  Who the hell's side are you people ON, anyway!!!???  Get your heads out of your asses and into the fight, you damn pansies.

     Or get the fuck out of my way.

     We tried your "Church Lady" approach.  It worked so fucking well that now we face a nuclear war with moslem FREAKS, STD infected children that can barely read or write, and a nation that is nearly one-third homosexual-by-choice.  Pardon me for saying that your damn idea SUCKED!!!

     And that goes for you too, Bill O'Reilly and Sean Hannity.  This isn't fucking Sunday School, morons....it's fucking war.  Get a clue.  Michael Savage is right, you pansies aren't helping anyone but the damn liberals.

     You can sure tell which talking heads served in the military, and which didn't.  Uh huh.

     The liberals all prefer it when Republicans simply "pray for them".  Liberals prefer it when Republicans are "nice and polite" to them.  GET A FUCKING CLUE!!!!   You idiots WORK FOR THE LIBERALS!!!

     If the liberal HATES what you are doing or saying...then you are DOING THE RIGHT THING!!!   Good LORD, this is NOT rocket science.

     Get mean.  Get brutal.  Drag these sons-of-bitches by the hair to the destiny they worshiped all their misbegotten lives.  This is war and the cheesedick pacifist ONLY HELPS THE ENEMY.  You guys and girls better get your heads out of what happened 2000 years ago and start living in the real world.....today.  You know, March/April 2007.  Not a single person on this planet requires you parroting two thousand year old events on and on like a broken record.  What we need is YOUR FIGHTING SPIRIT TODAY, DAMMIT!!!!

     And if God saw fit to deny you that spirit....then get the hell out of my way.  I have a nation to save and a war to win here.  I DO NOT apologize for friendly fire.

     If you cannot bring yourself to verbally assault them, judge them, re-vile them, beat them, attack them, cut them off economically, spit on them, go out of your way to have them arrested and tried, and blast them in the face whenever they dis-respect a soldier or ANYTHING else American for that matter...then get the hell off my team.  I only play winners.  Pansies can watch from the stands or go join the Oakland Fucking Raiders.  I'm sure Al Davis will find a spot for you on his ...."team".

     Nuff said....

"Liberals Cheat; Can't Compete"

     Evidence and events speak for themselves.  In the last week or two, Senator John McCain's myspace account was hacked as was Rush Limbaugh's.  Lying liberal scumbags will say otherwise, but they are lying criminals without a shred of patriotism, morals, or shame, so who gives a rat's ass what they think.

     They have also been trying to take my site down as well.  I've been hacked twice, but thanks to a brain that constantly outmaneuvers retarded DUMBFUCKS, I'm up, running, blogging, and kicking their AMATEUR ASSES!!!

       AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!  Better luck next time, fags.  You tried.....you tried.

    

     Why are the lib-idiots resorting to hacking mainstream Republicans on a constant basis?  Very simple.  They can't write worth a shit and can't get any readers, so they cheat.  It's what liberals have ALWAYS DONE......cheat.

     They cheat on their spouses....they cheat their kids....they steal from their employers, neighbors, and strangers if given the opportunity.  I've even met liberals that steal from their own children.  You CANNOT let them even use your bathroom...ever...the liberal will go through your cabinets and steal your wife's make up and rifle through your prescription drugs.  They are common criminals that will vandalize your house, your car, ...anything they can get hold of they will destroy.  They have no respect for anyone or anything.  They are anti-human dysfunctional narcissists that think the entire world revolves around their itching and diseased crotch.  You can't trust liberals with your children, they will molest them every time.  And then lie to your face and say they were "teaching them".

     Of course, they also cheat here on myspace as well.

     They use auto-reloaders to artificially inflate their blogs ratings.  Then, like the spiteful little brats they are, they resort to hacking their competition.  It's what you do when you have no shot at winning and have no moral values.....you cheat.

     Rush Limbaugh was whipping their sorry asses....so they hacked him....and made him more popular.

     They hacked John McCain's site....and gave him a ton of free press and sympathy.

     And now they've tried to hack your's truly twice....and lost.....but are only make ME more popular as well.

     Liberals are not just fucking losers....they are fucking stupid as well.

     However, I have an idea.  Actually a few of them.  Let's run these sorry bastards off of myspace.  It should be real easy.  All we have to do is hammer each other blogs and push ALL OF OUR blogs into the Top Twenty.  Then just do as Tom suggests and change your password frequently.  Oh, and last but certainly not least...(hehehehehe)...block and ban any and all libtards on myspace that you even GLIMPSE.  Cut them off and cut them out.  Think of South Park's Cartman and his dog training episode.  Without the attention these dysfunctional children crave, they will wither and die...diddling themselves to death.

     And to you dumb fucking liberal traitors?  I'm coming for you.  In ways your pathetic imagination can't even conceive of.  Tyger is far, FAR tougher than you dirtbags think.  Have a nice fucking day.

    You tried, you pathetic assholes.....LMAO....you tried....

"Sean Penn Drooling On Bush And Other Musings..."

     Well, who knew??!!!

     Sean Penn is a homosexual and wants to have sex with the President...AND his administration!!!

     To wit:  ".....you can shove it .....and bathe in the moisture....of your underwear."

     ??????

     Sounds to me like Sean has been sneaking into Michael's drugs.  This fuck has LOST it!!!  LOL.

     "moisture of your underwear."??????    LMMFAO.....Sean, wtf????  Please, dude, put the "penn" down.  A writer you ARE NOT.  "moisture of your underwear"????   AHAHAHAHAHA!!!

     Good Lord, you're a FUCKING geek!!!

     What the fuck is it with liberals and the crotch?  Everything that goes on in their freaky-deeky, drugged-out, abort-a-baby world seems to revolve around endless statements surrounding the genital region of the human body.  Are they "stuck on stupid", or what?

     I've often referred to liberals as immature, emotionally stunted children that never grew up.  There is ample evidence for this, ....but only when one includes THEIR OWN WORDS.   LMMFAO!!!

     "moisture in your underwear....."

     I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that Sean Penn has been having some ....rather strange thoughts about the President.  Then again, he DID attend the Clinton fund-raiser.  Perhaps he has "Thumbellina Bill" on his mind these days?  Or perhaps Sean is just so used to pissing his pants that phrases like this come natural to him.

     THIS is why writers find actors and actresses without a shred of creative talent to be utter bores, and why most writers find those that worship and adore (dare-I-say-it) "pissant" actors and actresses to be nothing more than ignorant peasants, and only worthy of material like "Friends".

: X

   

     Now, it's 3 AM and I'm going to wander a bit here.

     I get hit up all the time to "be a comic", or to "take your act on the road", etc., etc., etc.  And it's great and natural advice.  I'm witty.  I have a voice (writer-speak for unique style).  I've been blessed with a quick and agile mind that seems to produce an endless quantity of material.  I've also got a certain "physical presence", as my natural brashness, half-a-century on Earth, and absence of any scars will attest to.  And people have always (well, some of them) listened to me.  I'm a natural leader.  They said so in the Navy and were correct.

     But it's never going to happen.  Never.  Ever.  Hell will freeze over first.  Ahmadinejad will convert to Judaism first.  Rosie O'Donnell will marry Donald Trump first.

     "Why" you ask?  Very simple.  I have zero motivation to do so.  I'm NOT an actor and the "stage", as it were, simply does nothing for me.  It's a ten-minute celeb buzz and a slight ego-puff, and then my mind is occupied with larger things.  The stage and Tyger were simply not meant to be.

     However....

     There ARE things that do motivate me...and in a very large way.

    "Let me s'plain, boss....."

     I want to win.  Period.  That's it.  That's my whole gig.  The entirety of the relevant portions of my existence in this life from my own personal perspective can be summed up in two words.  I win.

     Always, and no matter what.

     Anyone out there play Madden '07, the football game?  I do.  I like to play in what is called the "Superstar Mode".  It's a format where you play a Sim that is the actual football player, in my case, a Quarterback.  You start as a cheesedick rookie without brains, experience, or savvy...and have to work your way up by performing well....etc., etc., etc.  You do this by winning games.  You DON'T get to be an Elway or a Marino out of the gate.  Most of the time, your Sim is very average type of football physical skills player.  Cannon arms are rare.  If you're a decent player, that means a low-life loser team drafts you and you REALLY have to work hard to win a damn thing.  The object of the game is to play a NFL player's entire career of football games and attempt to get voted into the "Hall Of Fame".  Keep in mind that as a player you have ZERO control over who the team drafts, trades, plays, starts, or what the other players do or how they perform.  You are just the Quarterback (in my case).

     I play at a VERY high level of difficulty.  After ten years (game-time), my record is 172-1.  That's right.  I've lost one game.  By two points.  It was my first game, rookie season, and the kicker missed the 48-yard FG to win the game at the end.

     Needless to say, I can read a defense in seconds and am right a large percentage of the time.

     I cannot tell you one thing about the 172 wins,...including the 9 Superbowl wins so far....but I remember the one loss PERFECTLY.  Tyger wins.  That's what I do.  If I can't win, I won't play.  It's that simple.

     I coached football in the U.S. Navy for one-year (the ship was under a Congressional Investigation and chained to the pier in San Diego....we had some time to burn).  I never lost.  Took over a team with a 0-1 record.  I won the next 13 games and the Division Championship.  Then I beat El Toro Marine base 32-0 and the Navy SEALS from Coronado (both previously undefeated) 12-6.

     My ship had 212 sailors on it.  That's what I picked my "team" from.

     I won a championship with them.  We never lost.

     I could go on, (like I haven't already) ....but I think my point is clear, hard as it may be to comprehend.

     According to Max Planck and others, quantum mechanics determines that THERE MUST EXIST a certain set that "wins" ...ALL OF THE TIME.  LOL.  Think about it.

     SOMEONE has to win....all the time.  One set of reality ALWAYS WINS.  It's the law of probability.

    

     Where am I wandering with this stuff at 3:30 am?  Well...considering my lack of ego when it comes to celerity-type gratification, and considering my talent to beat my opponents silly time after time after time....my TRUE PASSION in life.   Is to fish.

     But NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO............................

     Tyger can't be left alone to a sweet-and-decent life with a beautiful woman, great kids, good wine, and an even better river that I can drop a line into daily and THOROUGHLY ENJOY myself.  No.

     That would just be too simple, mundane, and pleasant.

     Instead.....I get 9-fucking-11.

     Thanks a lot, dickheads.  Thanks a fuck-of-a-lot.

     No...instead I get a bunch of cheesedick death-cult ignorant FREAKS who want to usher in Armageddon!!!   Instead I get the fucking Osamaland Faiders of the world trying to act all bad-assed and deciding to piss in my pristine fishing river.

     So...now you Islamic fucks want to play.  Now you pricks want to get on the field and compete, eh?  Now you want to attack my way of life, eh?  Now you want to attack my nation, my family, my people.....eh?

     So...now you raghead bastards will burn in HELL!!!!

    

     After my last blog, the one where I personally DARE Ahmadinejad to confront his past and me, a lot of you probably thought I was a "leeeetle crazy....you know this guy...".

     All I will say is this.  You weren't there....you don't know....you can't imagine....and this guy called the game, not me.  I was content to fish.

    Instead.....we're going to play war.  Real war.  The kind where I win and you die.

     Yup.

     The draft is in a few weeks.  Training camp starts this spring.  All summer will be weeding and sorting out the roster, perfecting how I am going to kick your ass.

     And then come September.....it's kickoff, motherfucker.

     Yipee kiya!!!!

   

And all I wanted to do was fish....

"I Am The Father Of Anna Nicole's Baby"

     Like I've said....a day late and a dollar short.  But....what the hell, the rest of the libtards are lining up to score some graveyard cash, might as well throw the hat......errrr, in the ring.

     Besides....it's all true.  I was O.J. Simpson's chauffeur on the night in question, and once Howard K. Stern had passed out from sniffing two 8-balls of cocaine and a pair of Brittany Spear's panties,...while O.J. rifled her study for keys to a white suburban, I smeared shoe-polish on my face, donned a Hertz Rent-A-Car cap, ran down the corridor, leaped over a comatose Howard K.  And, ah....ah...."rented the car".  Yeah, that's the ticket...."rented the car".  Yup.....Tyger is the father of Anna Nicole's baby.

     So I had to go down to the clinic to establish my ..."credentials".  So I did.  Fortunately for my readers, my ever-faithful accomplice in mirth and mayhem, Doc Emmit L. Brown, installed a micro-transmitter and receiver on me and we were able to capture some of the...."experience".  Observe:

   

     (enters door and takes number from dispenser)

     (sits down in waiting room)

     (whistles "Dixie"....)

      "Heyyyyyy......I know YOU!!!  You're....?   You're....?"

     "Why thunk u vury much, Tyger.  It'z gud tu see u agin."

     "Oh my God!!!  You can't be here because.....because....?"

     "Oh yes,  I iz nimbur fur-teen.  Thut is reely, reely funy, cuz thut iz also my IQ."

     "No doubt...  I had no idea that Man-Bear-Pig's were fertile."

     "Oh yes.  It iz tha "pig" part thut iz tha most fertilez.  Also, goober warming causes moor Man-Bear-Pigs ta be moorz fertilez thun every b-4.  I leernt thuts frum my mentoorz an' Muther Supereeyor.  U'v mitt hims b-4.  Hair he cums nowz.....hi, Bubba'z!!!  Hi, Bubba'z!!!"

     (convicted felon and ex-Democrat President who was responsible for bin Laden's security until 9/11 Bill Clinton comes out of the Ladies Room, zipping up his pants and wiping at a large quantity of what appears to be urine stains on the front of his pants.)

     "Wull, hi there, Al!!!  How the hell are you, good buddy?  Come on down for the paternity lottery today?  It sure is exciting, isn't it?"

     "Oh, it suurz iz reel exsitinz, Bubba!!!  Huv u seen Tipper anywherez arund, Bubba? ....I dun lost her'z agin."

     "She's in the Ladies Room, Al.  Be right with you as soon as she freshens up."

     "Oh....okayz.  Did u say "hi" tu herz?"

     "No.  I wrote it on her forehead this time.  "Hi, Pig!!!""

     "Ha, ha, ha, ha!!!  Thut iz vury funy, Bubba!!!  U ares a vury funy manz!!!  Whut did u write it with?"

     "Oh, I used my own materials."

     (just then,  Osama bin Hussein bin Obama bin Barak walks into the waiting-room, smiles at everyone, and takes a number.)

     "Salaam, Bubba!!!  Salaam, Man-Bear-Pig!!!  Top o'tha mornin' to ye laddies!!!  Wanna kimbo beelaboonawon meena tonka wahbahabba to!!!  That means, "I don't want to be rude, but you left your camel under my bed this morning!!"   Har, har, har, har!!!!"

     Bubba frowns, "You laugh like a jackass..."

     "Allah Akbar, Bubba.  Yes, the jackass on my mother's side was Irish.  Ted Kennedy and I are cousins!"

     "Thut iz reely, reely funy, O'Simba!!!  U huv ta meets my wifes, Tipper.  She luvs a good joke."

     Tyger interupts, "I guess so.  She married you...didn't she?"

     "O'Simba....u shuld reely, reely go and see'z ma wifes, Tipper.  Bubba dun'd painted her face tuday jes licks Anna Nicole'z painted her faced....befur she croaked, thut iz."

     "Allah Akbar, Man-Bear-Pig.  Aye, laddie, that'd be a fair piece o'advice ye be givin' me.  Where be the lucky lass, by chance?"

     "Oh, she be in tha Ladeez Room.  Bubba kin show yoo's tha way..."

     "Why thank ye, Man-Bear-Pig.  I'll be off now, an' payin' me respects!!!  Bubba?  Care to join me?"

     "I wouldn't miss this for the world AND Monica again."

     (just then, Screecher of the House, Nancy Pelosi enters the waiting room, eyes darting around, and looking confused and manic.)

     "Wull, hi there'z, Duncey!!!  R u here'z ta bee tha father'z uv Anna Nicole's baby tu?"

     "No, moron.  I'm the Grandmommer."

   

     At this point I ran screaming from the waiting room.  I think I'll wait for the Adoption Wars.

   

     : /